What To Do if Mindfulness isn’t Working for You
With mindfulness going “mainstream” in recent years, the original intent and purpose seem to have been diluted. Critical pieces of the practice have eroded over time or been misapplied resulting in only a superficial understanding of why it works. The downside of its widespread adoption, as with any trend, is that as more and more people try it with limited success its luster will begin to fade and soon be replaced by “the next big thing” as we continue to look outside ourselves for the solution. If even the mere mention of the word “mindfulness” at this point causes you to eye-roll, read on.
The single biggest misconception about mindfulness is about what it is designed to help you do. It was never intended to help you “clear your mind,” or even help you feel relaxed, although a lot of people do indeed find it relaxing. The point of mindfulness practice is to “exercise” your executive functioning centers and strengthen your ability to focus. The practice involves being more deliberate about where you direct your attention and is ultimately designed to help you become more aware, more focused, more intentional, and more engaged with the present moment. With that comes reduced anxiety for most people and less rumination, a type of overthinking we often see in depression.
There has been some concern that mindfulness may make symptoms of anxiety or depression worse. In my experience, as someone who practices, teaches, and studies mindfulness, when applied properly and as intended, I have never seen it make someone’s symptoms worse. Most of the time, what I see, is people abandon the practice before they experience the benefit, or get frustrated because they think it’s not working. I can certainly see how that might turn people off, but I also think it underscores the importance of understanding its original design and working with an experienced mindfulness practitioner. There are great programs out there from reputable institutions, like the UMass Center for Mindfulness, UCLA Mindful Awareness Research Center, or the Benson-Henry Institute at MGH. With that said, however, there are some clinical presentations for which mindfulness may be contraindicated. For those individuals struggling with psychosis or psychotic thoughts, those with a history of suicidal thoughts, or those with a history of significant trauma in which dissociation or intrusive recollections (“flashbacks”) are symptoms, I would highly advise working with a therapist or mindfulness instructor first without attempting on your own.
I was recently asked if I think people, in general, are coping better now with anxiety and depression, even though the rates keep going up. I do see a shift happening in how people are coping, and I think it’s a positive one. I see more interest in people learning effective skills for managing symptoms on their own and relying less on medication. There is an increasing interest in self-care practices or self-management of symptoms which is important for taking control of your health and preventing illness. Another exciting shift is that we are incorporating our knowledge of the brain into our treatments more explicitly. We are leveraging what we know about neuroplasticity, which is our ability to rewire or “retrain the brain,” and mindfulness just happens to be one of the best tools we have for the job.
Mindfulness is not a trend. It has been shown to be a reliable and valid approach for treating mental health disorders and has strong scientific support for its effectiveness in the prevention of depression relapse and in reducing rumination. It has been studied quite extensively in chronic pain management, addiction relapse prevention, appetite awareness for binge eating disorder, attentional control for ADHD, emotion regulation in mood disorders, and distress tolerance in anxiety. It is one of the most effective methods for teaching people how to monitor their own thoughts and better understand their unhelpful thought patterns. It is also a foundational skill for learning how to self-regulate the nervous system. The list goes on and on. It has become a bit of a buzzword, but it’s certainly not new or even “new age.” Mindfulness is rooted in Buddhist philosophy and tradition and has been practiced in Eastern cultures for a couple of thousand years. It’s only in recent years that it has become Westernized and thus “mainstream.”
If you are struggling with mindfulness, don’t get discouraged. I would invite you to consider that the point of the practice is just to practice, to notice what it’s like to practice, and to sit with yourself for a while. There really is no other goal to achieve. The practice is the goal. However, to make it a bit more concrete than that, instead of sitting and breathing, I would encourage you to make your mindfulness practice a little more active and engaging. For example, practice drinking your coffee mindfully, washing your hands mindfully, walking mindfully, folding clothes mindfully, washing dishes mindfully. This simply means that while you are doing these things, bring your full attention to it. Be “all in,” as they say. Practice “single-tasking.” Use all five senses. By doing this, you are training your brain to focus on what’s happening right in front of you, right here – right now. I tell my patients, if you want to practice mindfulness every day, make things you do every day a mindfulness practice.
The truth is it’s simply not possible to completely clear your mind. Our brains are designed to think, to problem-solve – that’s the default mode. It would be like telling your heart to stop pumping blood or your lungs to stop breathing. The trick is to give it something else to do, something else to focus on, something to “distract” it with on purpose. If you’re doing it right, you may not feel “relaxed” and your mind may not be “clear,” but you will feel more in control of what your mind is doing and you will feel more “present” as you purposefully direct your attention, awaken your senses, heighten your awareness, and stay focused.
